


The First and Last Time

by danehemmings



Series: Kakashi/Obito Drabbles [3]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Angst, Drabble, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-20
Updated: 2016-11-20
Packaged: 2018-09-01 04:28:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 930
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8607844
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/danehemmings/pseuds/danehemmings
Summary: All the times Kakashi tells Obito he's in love with him.





	

The first time Kakashi tells Obito he loves him, he's lying. As usual, they're fighting, because Obito has screwed up yet another mission. Kakashi says it mockingly, sarcastically, to get under Obito's skin. Rin pleads for them to stop, to remember that as teammates, they have to be like a family. Predictably, Obito stops yelling immediately. Kakashi, more irritated than ever before, had said bitingly, scathingly, “Yes, we're family. I love Obito so much.”

Obito, always so predictable, starts shouting at him again. Kakashi had been more than happy to resume the argument, though he felt yelling was beneath him. It had taken the arrival of Minato to pull them away from each other's throats.

Looking back at that moment now, Kakashi wonders if perhaps he wasn't lying after all. Who else ever riled him up as much as Obito. He should have known, by that simple fact, how important Obito was to him.

 

The next time he says it, Obito is breathing harshly, half of him crushed. Kakashi speaks the words so quietly none but himself can hear them. He can't tear his eyes away from his fallen teammate. His eye, and Obito's eye. He watches Obito breathe, in and out, in and out, each breath a gasp of pain, though he'd insisted he could feel nothing but numbness. Kakashi remembers thinking distantly that a dying man would not be breathing so quickly. He remembers hoping, as he whispers his love, that somehow they might retrieve Obito from underneath the boulder, and he could return Obito's eye to its rightful owner. But then, shinobi are upon them, and Kakashi drags Rin from Obito's side as his other half is crushed.

Obito wouldn't have wanted his eye back. Kakashi realizes that now, too. He'd have laughed at Kakashi for even trying to return his gift.

 

The third time he says it, its not a whisper or a lie, but a cry of agony. He's on his knees, sobbing, next to the memorial stone. Rin is dead, by his own hands. Obito died, saving him. He feels as though he is dying, as well. He feels cursed. Everyone he loves, his father, Obito, Rin, dead. He fears for Minato, for Kushina, for Guy. He's been avoiding them, because if he avoids them, maybe he can save them. But Obito is already gone, and so Kakashi can spend as much time as he pleases here, can say I love you, as many times as he wants. And he does. I love you, I love you, iloveyouiloveyouiloveyou. 

It doesn't make things better. He feels his hysteria rise each time he says it, but he can't stop, because he never got the chance to tell Obito when he was alive. I love you, I love you. 

His forehead presses against the cold stone, and he cries, and confesses his love. Minato finds him, hours later, and tries to coax him away, but Kakashi won't leave Obito. He's mouthing the words, over and over, though no sound comes out anymore. Minato sits down beside him slowly, carefully, and puts a hand on Kakashi's back. He squeezes gently, but Kakashi keeps his head on the stone, and his eyes fixed to Obito's name.

He leaves the stone when Kushina finds them as the moon starts to slip downwards, with the promise to return everyday to remind Obito of his love.

 

Kakashi watches the mask break, sees the face which confirms his theory, and is frozen. Obito, alive. Alive. His heart soars, for one single second, then drops sharply. Obito, alive. Obito, the enemy. Obito, a mass murderer, and...Obito, evil. It takes him a long time to recover. This is the man he loves, the man whose name sits on the memorial stone which he has been spent countless hours next to. Its a dream, a nightmare. The world could end at any moment, if Obito is successful. Its already ended, for Kakashi. He fights on, somehow. He feels his heart break anew. The wound created when he thought Obito died rips open, deeper than before, but Kakashi fights on. Because Naruto, who has taught Kakashi so much, always believes the best in people. That everyone can be saved. So maybe, maybe Obito still has a chance.

They go into kamui, and there's a pause as they stare at each other. Kakashi can almost pretend they are arguing about another failed mission. Or sparring, with Minato and Rin watching. As Obito glares at him, with hate etched across his face, Kakashi says “I love you.” He says it quickly, pleadingly. He didn't plan to say it, but it slips out of its own accord. He can't take it back. He doesn't want to. There's a flicker in Obito's eyes, a flash of the Obito Kakashi once knew, a scrap of hope.  
Its gone as quickly as it came, but Obito must know Kakashi saw it, for he says, “You loved me. But I am not the same boy you loved, years ago.”

But he was. This, Kakashi discovers later, as Obito joins him to fight against Madara, then Kayuga.

 

Its not too long later, when Kakashi says I love you to Obito for the last time. Obito has been impaled, and he's crumbling away, dying once again to save Kakashi's life. When he's said his piece to Naruto, it slips out of Kakashi's mouth one more time, this time shakily. “I love you.” 

Obito smiles, the same smile as when he was a boy, and answers just before he fades away completely. “I love you, too.”


End file.
